


all done

by ficfacfoe



Category: UnREAL (TV)
Genre: F/F, Kingsgold, Spoilers, finale, season 4
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-27
Updated: 2018-07-27
Packaged: 2019-06-17 05:49:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15454710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ficfacfoe/pseuds/ficfacfoe
Summary: the final scene of season 4 continued





	all done

**Author's Note:**

> hi i wrote this immediately after watching the finale and wanted to wait and let syd read it first but she still hasnt had time to catch up and i cant wait any longer so here it is im sorry syd everyone else pls leave comments i need to TALK about this FINALE HELLOOOO 911

She’s in Quinn’s bed. Quinn is holding her, one hand in Rachel’s hair, the other arm wrapped around her tightly, thumb drawing mindless patterns on her shoulder. Rachel’s head rests heavily on Quinn’s chest as she pulls herself closer, as close as physically possible.

 

Chet is somewhere on the other side of the door, and Rachel feels sick to her stomach at the thought. 

 

“I love her,” he had said in greeting, and Rachel had replied without second thought. “Me, too.” Finally, some truth. And still, he had let her in. Because of course, of course he has no idea how much. He has no idea. He let her in, let her shut the door to Quinn’s bedroom carefully, let her crawl into bed with his fiancée, completely unthreatened. What a clueless idiot, Rachel thinks, grinding her teeth. She smiles bitterly and sniffles.

 

Rachel squeezes her eyes shut, squeezes Quinn’s pajama top in her fists.

 

“God, I’m sorry,” she mumbles, resting her chin against Quinn’s sternum to glance up at her.

 

Rachel lets her hand slide over Quinn’s stomach. “I’m so sorry,” she says again, eyes swimming with fresh tears, acknowledging Quinn’s loss for the first time, allowing herself to think of it as one for the first time. Quinn chokes on a breath. Her hand slips down from Rachel’s shoulder to meet Rachel’s on her stomach. For a mind-numbing fraction of a second, Rachel imagines Quinn’s stomach big, their hands joined all the same.

 

“You know you don’t have to be sorry,” Quinn rasps. “You know I’m not, right?”

 

A sigh of relief escapes Rachel. 

 

“I just,” she starts, “I can’t believe you’d still protect me like this, after everything… everything I’ve done, to the show, to you-”

 

“Stop,” Quinn interrupts. “Rachel.” 

 

She drags their joined hands up until Rachel’s palm meets Quinn’s cheek, and lifts her own to cradle Rachel’s face. “I say and do horrible things, too, god knows. Even to you. But you know I never mean them, right?”

 

Time stands still while Quinn’s eyes search Rachel’s for true understanding. But after everything they’ve done, after everything that’s been going on, Rachel just can’t grasp any of it. She can no longer tell the difference between sincerity and denial, so she goes to do the only thing she knows feels real. Quinn’s eyes widen dangerously when Rachel jerks forward, grip strong on the woman’s jaw. “Rachel,” Quinn gasps, “I can’t, not here…”

 

Something twists in Rachel’s stomach at that, reminding her that this bed, this place is Quinn and Chet’s. She readjusts, rests her forehead against Quinn’s, caresses her cheek with her thumb. 

 

From up this close, Quinn’s eyes are huge, silently pleading with Rachel to be very, very careful. 

 

So Rachel buries her face in Quinn’s neck instead, breathes in the smell of her perfume. Home.

 

Quinn hums, sounding half pained, half relieved. “I need you to know something,” Quinn mutters, pressing her lips to Rachel’s hairline momentarily. Rachel’s twofold heart twists between anxious and hopeful, pounding heavily in her chest. 

 

“What?”

 

Fingers comb through her hair softly. Quinn continues. “When you found out about the pregnancy.” She pauses, hand stilling. “You told me that you had thought I was happy because of us, and I said… What I said to you, Rachel…”

 

Rachel lifts her head, moves away to stare at Quinn. She’s been thinking about that conversation. She’s been agonizing over it.

 

Quinn smiles through a frown, tears starting to spill from her eyes. 

 

“I don’t think I’ve ever told a worse lie.” 

 

Rachel’s heart somersaults.

 

“You were right, Rach. You were so right, I was happy because of you, because of us, that day.” 

 

Quinn’s breath comes out uneven, her voice shaky. 

 

“And I never should’ve said... I never meant-”

 

_ This is about my family, and that’s not you. _ It rings in Rachel’s ears where her pulse hammers loudly and keeps picking up speed. And her head spins.

 

“You  _ are _ ,” Quinn chokes out. “You’re my... Rachel, you are…”

 

Rachel nods rapidly, tries to steady her own breathing. “I know,” she assures Quinn, pressing a kiss to the corner of her mouth that has Quinn shivering. 

 

“Don’t-” Quinn tries again, voice breaking. Rachel shakes her head. 

 

“I know,” she repeats. “I know, not here.” Rachel smiles a tired, bittersweet smile. “And Quinn.” She makes a point of making steady eye contact, softly touches her hand to Quinn’s cheek once more. The woman’s grip tightens around Rachel’s back. “Quinn, I  _ know _ . You don’t need to explain. It has always been you, for me. This has always been real. And it’s always been about you. But then Chet… I just couldn’t let myself believe you felt the same way. I know, now, Quinn, I get it. I know.”

 

With a heavy breath, Quinn’s whole body relaxes under Rachel. Eyes closed, hand in Rachel’s hair, Quinn sighs in a voice more tender than anything Rachel has ever heard leave her lips, “I love you, Rachel.” 

 

She wants to kiss her, wants to kiss her properly, so badly, wants to hold Quinn closest and never let her go again, but she knows that this is still wrong, still the wrong place and time. But one of those, they can change.  

 

“Let’s go home,” she whispers. “Quinn. Come home with me.”


End file.
